A Family With Only One Parent

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I grew up in a family with only one parent, my mom. And now, my five kids are also getting used to having only me because their dad is not here. I threw him out of the house after twenty years of marriage and fifty or so mistresses later. Do not get me started on the illegitimate children. It is as if he is a fire extinguisher, blowing out his sperm to any woman who wants to catch it.

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What I Realized About Me, And My Failed Marriage During This Pandemic

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I don’t think my children will understand at this time why I can’t stand the sight of their father. My parents were divorced too, and I was a daddy’s girl. I always had fights with my mom when I was younger because I wanted to be with my dad more than to be with her. We weren’t that close when I grew up, and like clockwork, history repeats itself. My first-born hates me and loves his father. She loves her father, who used to beat my emotional being, hurt my psychological health, and of course, gave me a taste of his hand a few times in the twenty years that we were together. That’s what I don’t get. She has seen how he was with me, but how is it that she hates me?

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Eating Tips To Keep You Healthy During The Coronavirus Pandemic

For those looking forward to something like the 2019 Fast Food Event, your luck’s out, thanks to the coronavirus. While some food chains deliver, it’s still advisable that you eat healthy while in lockdown. Not sure how? Follow these tips.

Cook At Home

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Instead of ordering out, take this time to learn to cook at home. Not only will your home-cooked meals be healthier, but you’ll be saving more per dish. Cooking is also an excellent opportunity to spend more time with your family. Turn it into a bonding experience in the kitchen. You can even involve your kids and teach them basics.

Eating together at fixed times also establishes structure and routine. Such can help you alleviate anxiety and ease into the new “normal.”

Increase Your Intake Of Fruits and Vegetables

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Even without the pandemic, we all know how important it is to add fruits and vegetables to our diet. These food items are chock full of vitamins and minerals that keep us healthy.

Whenever you can, choose fresh produce over frozen or canned items. However, dried and canned options will do if you don’t have access to such. Beans and chickpeas are smart choices as they have a long shelf life.

Grow Your Food

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As we mentioned earlier, fresh produce is the healthiest choice you have for food. However, many groceries are running out of stocks due to the health crisis. Because of this reason, people are starting to grow their food. Home gardens are becoming more commonplace, with some governments distributing free seeds and seedlings to their citizens.

We’re not saying you have to grow a full-blown farm in your backyard. Some people don’t have that much space. However, some plants don’t require a lot of space. You can even grow vegetables such as onions, potatoes, lettuce, and carrots from food scraps.

Summary

Eating healthy doesn’t have to be difficult while in lockdown. Some things you can do include preparing home-cooked meals, eating more fruits and vegetables, and growing your food. With these tips, you’re already one step closer to living healthier.

On Travel: The COVID-19 Outbreak

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The news of COVID-19 became clear to me when I was planning for my Dubai trip last January 2020. It was both a business and pleasure trip for me as I had to meet up with potential OFW clients. OFW means Overseas Filipino Worker, and I was selling real estate properties to them. I have earned my certificate for Real Estate Salesperson just this 2019, and with that, I have connected myself with a prestigious real estate company.

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The Ultimate Checklist On Opening A Food Business

The 2019 Chef Conference stood by its theme “The Key To Culinary Success” by going through the ultimate checklist in opening a food business. Therefore, if you are a restaurant owner aspirant, make sure to go through the list thoroughly and keep in mind the following tips.

Finalize Your Business Plan

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The essential first step in establishing your food business is coming up with a feasible business plan. This step is necessary since this will dictate what your next steps will be. When constructing your business plan, make sure to include the following: 

  • Business Entity: Is it going to be a sole proprietorship, general partnership, or a Limited Liability Company (LLC). 
  • Nature Of Business: Are you going to be a full-service restaurant and bar (FSRB), quick-service restaurant (QSR), or a food truck. 
  • Target Market: Who are you planning to serve? Do you think these people will be a fitting group of customers?
  • Business Location: Make sure to look for a place where your business will be sustainable. At the same time, ensure its accessibility as well. 
  • Business Name and Logo: Your marketing strategy is a vital factor for your business success. Your name and logo will create your overall brand and establish product recall. 

Scout Potential Competitors

Just because you think your restaurant concept is better than the other doesn’t mean you’ll survive in the industry. Don’t underestimate them, because you’re not yet sure whether you can perform better than them. Admittedly, their business won’t still be there if they’re not doing good.

Sort Out Your Finances

One of the essential aspects of your business is your financials. A lot of owners acquire the money they need to open the restaurant. However, they mostly forget about the running capital that they need to sustain the food business.

If you have computed that your current on-hand money is not enough to fund both your start-up and working capital, then maybe it’s time to explore other sources. You may meet potential investors such as small business bureau, banks, private investors, and more. Just make sure that everything is laid out already so you’ll be able to impress them. Their first impression is vital since they will use this as their basis on whether their money is safe in your hands.

Finalize Your Menu

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Your menu is the heart of your food business. It is one of the most significant determining factors why your customer will come back to your restaurant. With this in mind, it is crucial to put a lot of time and to think into drafting your menu.

One of the essential factors that you should consider is the size of your kitchen. The smaller your kitchen is, the less variety you will be able to offer. But some restaurants make do with what they have. Even if they have tiny kitchens, they maximize what they have through cross-utilizing.

Employ The Best Staff

Even if you have the best food, best location, and best concept, your restaurant won’t function well if you do not employ the best staff. Make sure to hire an excellent and experienced head chef who can run the kitchen on his own.

To be able to get the best employees, put effort into looking at job portals. You may also scan through social media, check the advertisements on paper, or even use word of mouth on spreading the job position.

Starting a food business is not a walk in the park. There are a lot of things that you will have to consider for your success. So, make sure to follow these checklists so it will be an easier climb for you to the top.

Do You Enjoy Being Single?

“How favorably does singlehood compare to being in stable romantic relationships? Maybe it’s all in the perspective,” shares Theresa E DiDonato Ph.D. Many women declare that they will adopt a lot of cats because they believe that they will spend the rest of their lives alone. There are indeed benefits in having a life partner, such as sharing a mortgage with someone and sexual intercourse. However, there are also benefits to living a single life. It is okay to meet your one true love still.

However, the concept of being single and alone should not frighten you. “There are reasons that our society wants single people—especially those who identify as female—to feel pressure to find a traditional partner,” says Julia Bartz LMSW. Perhaps finding your one true love was a top priority in your life. Maybe you felt it was an essential need. As you grow older and more mature, perhaps you have started to recognize what being single can offer. Below are some symptoms and signs that you have begun enjoying being single.

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Sign 1: You Watch Netflix alone

You no longer use Netflix as an activity to do during a date. You have started to enjoy watching shows on Netflix, and you do not mind watching these shows by yourself.

Sign 2: You Stopped Buying Girl Magazines And Started With Housekeeping Or Other Subscriptions

You used to subscribe to Cosmo and other kinds of girl magazines. You used to read their fashion tips and how to meet your one true love. You even used to read their tips on sex. But you have stopped subscribing to those kinds of magazines and now subscribe to other types of magazines. You now read magazines about food and entertainment news.

Sign 3: You Have Become A Bit Of A Slob

When you enter your home, you immediately take off your shoes and leave them lying where you took them off. As you move through your house, you take off pieces of clothing and also leave them where you took them off. There is now a trail of accessories and clothing all over your home.

Sign 4: You Have Not Been Grooming Yourself Much

You used to spend hours each day on your grooming regimen. But now you spend weeks without shaving DOWN THERE.

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Sign 5: You Occupy The Whole Bed When You Sleep

You used to sleep on only one side of the bed. But now you sleep like a starfish occupying the whole bed even if the mattress is a queen-sized bed.

Sign 6: You Purchase Items Designed For Single People

You no longer need help with your invisible zipper because you bought a device that assists you in getting it up or down. You purchased a tool that helps you open jars that are hard to open. You even bought a cookbook with recipes designed for only one person.

Sign 7: You Have A Variety Of Glasses

You own different varieties of glasses. You could even say it’s a smorgasbord of glasses. You usually have them displayed on the table beside your bed. It seems that people who are not single do not do this. But you are single, and you can do whatever you want to do.

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Sign 8: You Still Order Meals Good For Two

You eat one meal and save the second meal for later. It is more efficient than having to cook then.

Sign 9: Your Pinterest Board Is Now About Practical Matters

Your Pinterest board used to be about your future wedding plans. Now you pin food recipes and how to recycle old t-shirts.

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Sign 10: You Are Too Focused On Your Career

You used to dream of getting married and appending a Mrs. to your name. Now you are concentrating on your career and attaching the word CEO after your name.

Sign 11: You Equate Dating As A Fun Thing

You are dating someone used to be a serious matter that often made you nervous. Now it is a fun game that you enjoy. “What’s more, many people who are single at heart are just not at all interested in searching for a long-term romantic partner. When they think about the joys of single life, they say to themselves, “That sounds great!”, states social psychologist Bella DePaulo, Ph.D.

Bits Of Advice On Single People

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Many literary pieces are advising how to get a significant other. However, what should you do until you get one? Here is some advice on remaining happy, and content, while being unattached.

Advice 1: Do Activities On Your Own.

Many individuals are frightened to do activities by their lonesome. But being unattached should not prevent you from doing things. You should view a film. Eat out in a nice restaurant. Go to a grocery store and shop. Take a stroll in a park.

Advice 2: Avoid Being Cynical.

This will be difficult to do since there will be moments when you feel despondent. There will be moments that you will feel frustrated. There will be moments when you will be lonely. However, you should not despair. Know that better things will come tomorrow. According to Theresa E DiDonato Ph.D., “The fear of being single can hurt your chances for a happy romantic relationship.”

Advice 3: Go On A Journey, All By Yourself.

It may seem unnatural to go on a journey by yourself. But it will only feel that way at the start. Going on a vacation all by yourself provides you with greater freedom. You can set your timetable and explore places that you truly want to visit.

Advice 4: Find Yourself.

Get to know yourself better. Determine what your desires, goals, setbacks, and dreams are in life. Investigate the small troubled actions you frequently do and determine the reasons you do them. Determine who you are and what aspects about yourself you need to work on in to be whole.

Advice 5: Nurture Other Forms Of Kinship.

Having a significant other is not the only form of kinship available to you. Nurture your kinship with your friends and relatives. Relationships usually wane and strengthen as time passes; therefore, you should treasure the moments you have with your friends and relatives.

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Advice 6: Let Your Feelings Flow.

This advice goes hand in hand with getting to know yourself better. Do not bottle up your emotions. Admit to yourself the feelings that you feel whether it is sadness, anger, excitement, jealousy, or disappointment. If you feel gloomy, it is okay to shed tears.

Advice 7: Socialize With New People.

Socialize with new individuals to acquire new friends and not to find a significant other. Go out and have a conversation with different individuals. Hear what other individuals want to converse about with you. Get out of your comfort zone. Psychologist Bella DePaulo noted that “she likes her phrase “single at heart” better, given that it takes the unspoken goal of partnership out of the equation.”

Advice 8: Be True To Yourself.

Have you encountered an individual you truly desired? You can be dishonest to yourself and do nothing. Or you could be genuine to yourself and make a move and talk to the individual.

This advice must also be applied to dating online and all your other relationships. “As stigma about singlehood decreases, more people will end up being single, more people will choose being single out of a secure attachment style, and (hopefully) fewer people will be partnered or single for the wrong reasons,“ said psychiatrist Grant Hilary Brenner MD, FAPA.

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Advice 9: Do Activities That You Don’t Normally Do.

Be adventurous and zany. Go to a karaoke bar and sing your hearts out. Go to a dance studio and take tap dancing lessons.

Advice 10: Do Not Be Afraid To Commit Errors.

Experience your existence to the fullest and do not be afraid of committing errors along the way. As a human being, you will err sometimes, but that is normal, and it’s okay.

 

 

Living Your Life, The Single And Happy Way

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Many individuals consider being unattached as a sickness that needs to be cured. Many individuals also believe that having a significant other is better than being by your lonesome. If you do not enjoy being unattached, here are some items that might brighten your day.

Things Can Change

It does not matter if you have been unattached for a very, very long time. You should remember that everything and anything is achievable. All you have to do is to accept that fact that things can change in an instant. You might be single now, but you can meet someone tomorrow, next week or next year.  “The fear of being single can hurt your chances for a happy romantic relationship,” said Theresa E DiDonato Ph.D.

Set The Standards, And Never Settle

Do not go out with an individual because you are afraid you will never find a significant other. Many individuals settle for someone because they are so scared of being by their lonesome. However, you should not be afraid of being alone. Never settle.

Get To Know Yourself Better

Many use the time they spend with other individuals as a means of running away from their selves. Being unattached is an excellent opportunity to get to know yourself better.

Do Not Pursue

If you have to pursue an individual, then that means they are not interested in you. If they are not interested in you, then you should also not be interested in them.

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Reinvent Yourself.

Do not search for an individual to make you whole. If you require an individual to make you whole, then that means you are not complete in the first place.

Cherish The Alone Time.

Every person is unique. However, the difficulty lies in the fact that many individuals, particularly single people, do not believe in this. It is perfectly fine to spend a weekend by yourself to unwind, let loose, and be yourself. “When you’re alone you have to be more self-sufficient,” says Dr. Niloo Dardashti, a New York-based psychologist and relationship expert.

There Are Still Nice People Out There Who Could Be “The One.”

Do not believe that all the nice individuals are already seeing someone. There are still a lot of eligible and unattached individuals for you.

An Uncertain Future Can Be An Opportune Future.

One of the items unattached individuals hate is not being able to know and command the future. Many people hate uncertainty and have questions that cannot be answered. However, an uncertain future can be a suitable future.

Concentrate On What You Possess Now, Instead Of Thinking Of What You Lack.

Do not concentrate on the gloomy thoughts that you do not have a significant other. Concentrate on what you hold, such as having food to eat, owning a car, having good health, having great friends, and having an incredible career. Dr. Jenny Taitz, clinical psychologist says, “this is the critical time to figure out who you are and what you stand for.”

Occupy Your Time With Activities That Make You Whole.

Do you enjoy movies? You could go out and watch a movie. Do you like swimming? You could join a swimming or polo team. Do you want to exercise? You could join a gym. Do you like food? You could go out and eat at a fine restaurant.

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You Should Treat Yourself In The Same Manner That You Want Your Potential Significant Other To Treat You

If you have not been kind to your former significant others, do not do it again. If you have not been nice to yourself, cease and desist.

If You Are Lonely, Spend Some Time With Other People.

Helping other individuals will make you feel better. You could volunteer at an orphanage or a shelter for dogs.

Be Patient

Do not just settle for any individual. You should wait for your One True Love. Just hang on, he or she will come.

Single And Happy, Even Without A Partner

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“Sometimes people of all ages feel like they need to do things to make their partner stay with them, even if those things are unhealthy,” according to psychologist Brian Mustanski Ph.D. Spending a lot of time gazing at your smartphone waiting for a voice call or a text reply, and questioning whether someone has ghosted you yet again can be emotionally exhausting. This is true even for the most self-assured of individuals.

Being unattached indeed has advantages such as having the entire bed to yourself. However, being single is sometimes difficult. This is especially true if you want to have a significant other. Psychiatrist Grant Hilary Brenner MD, FAPA shares that, “Being partnered is generally seen as better than being single, and those who are single are often viewed with suspicion, especially if they say it is on purpose.”

Below is some advice on how to be cheerful even if you are unattached.

Advice 1: Engulf Yourself In Activities That Are Meaningful. Relish The HERE And NOW.

Scientists who study on people with inner peace, happiness, and contentment are very definite that what you do with your time, and the state of your mind is more important than having a significant other. You can have a significant other but still, be lonely and sad. Having a happy and satisfied life is an aggregation of exercising self-awareness, having the support of friends and relatives, and participating in meaningful activities.

Advice 2: Acknowledge That Not Everything You Think Is The Truth.

Sometimes you will have thoughts that are not positive. You might think that you will never find a significant other. Or you might think that all individuals worth your time to date are already with someone. Breaking free from a cycle of thoughts that are not positive can be difficult. A piece of advice that can assist in breaking free is to realize that not every idea in your head is correct.

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Advice 3: Do Not Delay Your Goals In Life, Even If You Are Partnerless.

If you are unhappy about being partnerless, then, ask yourself how having a significant other would change your existence. Perhaps you would answer that with a significant other you would be less ashamed. Or maybe with a significant other, you would stop having extensions for your eyelashes. Or perhaps with a significant other, you plan to have children. Regardless of the actions that you expect once you have a significant other, you should begin achieving them immediately.

Advice 4: Learn From Your Past Experiences. Do Not Allow Bad Moments To Ruin Your Present Life.

Very many individuals are so emotionally damaged by their bad experiences or by an excruciating breakup that they have given up all hope of finding a significant other. The first step towards recovery is to cease focusing on your former significant other. The second step is not to compare the individual you are currently dating with your former significant other. Also, do not remember past events with nostalgia.

Advice 5: Do Not Expect Too Much From Your Current Partner, If There Is One.

It’s good to be thrilled about seeing an individual. However, there is a subtle distinction between being excited about encountering a new individual and being over-excited that the individual you are about to meet will be your One True Love.

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Advice 6: Just Be You.

Be kind and be true to yourself. You don’t have to change who you are just because of another person. Occupy your time with activities that make you whole. Do you enjoy movies? You could go out and watch a movie. Do you like swimming? You could join a swimming or polo team. Do you want to exercise? You could join a gym. Do you like food? You could go out and eat at a fine restaurant. “When you’re alone you have to be more self-sufficient,”says Dr. Niloo Dardashti, a New York-based psychologist and relationship expert. 

Post-Breakup Thoughts That Healed Me And Prevented Me From Needing A Therapist

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Considering you have a friend, spouse, or family member who works as a therapist, have you ever asked them how many individuals have visited their clinic after a breakup?

The truth is that you can probably tell from experience that dealing with a messy split is never a soothing activity. You lose the love of your life to another individual or due to bad decisions, after all. That is enough for you to go through various stages of grief. And if you do not realize that that’s what’s happening in you, you may either feel too depressed to function or too angry to see reason.

In case you want to avoid going to a therapist’s clinic as much as possible and deal with your situation with professional intervention, you should read the passage below. Who knows, that may encourage you to change some things in your life for the best. “When you’re alone, it creates opportunity for being more in touch with something inside of you,” she says. says Dr. Niloo Dardashti, a New York-based psychologist and relationship expert.

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The Story

“I won’t give up on us even if the skies get rough…”

For people who have already found their soul mate, life partner, better half, or however you want to call it, this line in the lyrics from the song of Jason Mraz expresses how much they have gone through just to be with their loved one. But, for some other individuals, too, hearing this song is like having a realization when you get older and wiser after believing in fairy tales for so long: not everyone or everything has a happily ever after.

And that’s the painful truth.

It is very understandable for you to want to believe that the person you are romantically involved with right now is the person you will be with for the rest of your life, After all, admit it or not, male and female readers, we all want HAPPINESS in our lives. Plus, it is not wrong to fight for what you have if, God forbid, your relationship is challenged.

The Reality

However, before you do this, you have to remember who you are. You are not just a love-struck person whose judgment is clouded by the intense feelings that you have for the other person because love can be addictive to some people. In my opinion, loving should be like those commercial brands that say their products are 99.9% effective. You can love 99.9%, that’s fine, but that remaining 0.01% should at least be love for yourself. This is an important fact that individuals often forget when they get involved with someone.

Withstanding all the trials that come in your way would be easier to win over when you are with the person who loves you as much as you do to him/her. Nevertheless, if you feel like you’re already emotionally battered and it’s just you who is left fighting for the relationship, LET GO. It will be hard, yes; you may feel as if you are dying, too. Despite that, what else can you do? Besides, it is the lesser evil than waiting for the other person to come around when you already know that he won’t do so and you’re just in denial about it. “When we’re not in a relationship we really have some time to get clear about what matters to us and what we value,” Dr. Jenny Taitz, clinical psychologist explains.

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The main idea here is that you have to have your eyes fully open when you get into a relationship. You have to know the possible outcomes of it. Loving someone is a blissful feeling, but you have to be aware and ready when some unexpected things happen inside the relationship. Love whole-heartedly, but don’t be afraid to let go when you realize that it’s the only thing that you can do to save yourself – and the other person – from further heartaches.

Now, some of you may say, “How dare you to say these things?” while reading this, but all I can say is that I have been in that situation once upon a time. The happiness of being in love and loved, the pain that comes when indifferences start to show, and the helplessness that seeps through when you don’t know how else to save the relationship that is already on a dead end – I know such feelings firsthand. And I’m writing this as the person who has almost forgotten her real self after falling in love. Almost, but not quite.

I may or may not give up, but the important thing is that “I’m still looking up.”

You Should Treat Yourself In The Same Manner That You Want Your Potential Significant Other To Treat You

 If you have not been kind to your former significant others, do not do it again. If you have not been nice to yourself, cease and desist. If You Are Lonely, Spend Some Time With Other People.

Helping other individuals will make you feel better. You could volunteer at an orphanage or a shelter for dogs.

Be Patient

Do not just settle for any individual. You should wait for your One True Love. Just hang on, he or she will come. “Dealing with setbacks can be exhausting, so it’s important not just to push your way back too hard, but to rest and recharge along the way,” shares Ellen Hendriksen, Ph.D.

In The End

Going into a relationship is your choice, not anyone else’s. Going out of it is a decision that you should be able to make as well, especially if you know that it gives you nothing but pain these days.

Think of everything mentioned above to heal yourself post-breakup. Good luck!