Can married couples mend your failing marriage with or without counseling? Do you think you can resolve your problems without a professional help? Learn more about it here.
Fixing A Marriage Without Counseling
So how do you fix your broken marriage without counseling? Does spending time together work?
How Can You Heal Your Union By Yourselves?
“Share your feelings. Share that you want to feel close to your partner and how important they are to you,” Stuart B. Fensterheim, licensed clinical social worker said.
Marriage is all about open communication.
Married couples could not be psychics or mind readers according to licensed clinical social worker. If you need date night or want physical touch or physical intimacy, make sure to tell your spouse. No matter how much you two know each other, practice self awareness in life and say what’s in your mind.
Talk And Touch, Especially When Fixing Fights
Sincerity makes a big difference in a long term relationship and also in fixing marital spats. Unhappy marriage issues that happen are just actually a build-up of little moments that got dragged onto extended periods.
Be sincere when talking about these broken marriage issues and do them consistently to fix a broken marriage independently.
Think back on what your spouse would like as a gift. Give one partner gifts from time to time to remind him or her that you still have their interests in mind. Buy these gifts to shower your spouse with appreciation. He or she will feel important.
Getting Help From The Psych Expert
Change For The Better And For Yourself
Yes, fixing a failing marriage requires two people to act but that doesn’t mean you can’t take the initiative to fix it.
Waiting for both you to make a start could end up in you two waiting forever. Make the first move this time.
Get Involved With Each Other
One of the major problems in broken marriage is lack of connection between you and your spouse. Start paying attention to love languages and spend quality time with them to reconnect in life. Have date night or spend time to visit each other at work or meet with your friends. Involve each other’s opinions in everyday life.
Deal With Your Problems Privately
It might seem tempting but value your privacy. Don’t talk to people about relationship issues. They can’t help make your marriage work because you are the one who will decide on what to do. Only you can help yourself and your spouse.
Stop The Blaming
Avoid blame game in married life. Fixing is needed because you had a hand in it too. Think of what you could have possibly said and why you said it and consider these things to know if you still want to fix a broken marriage.
Marriage Is Like Two-Way Street And So Is Piecing It Together
Openly improve communication – it almost always prevents marital problems. Same way, it can also save marriage problems. Most couples reach out and discuss your marriage. It makes sense that the two of you are willing to listen to each other because that’s important in saving your relationship.
If the situation is too hot for the moment, walk away and then regroup when everything has settled. No hotheads. “Doing so can allow you to not only calm down but also to avoid worsening the situation by saying something in haste,” said Anna Osborn, LMFT, a licensed psychotherapist.
Make All The Necessary Efforts
As much as fixing a broken marriage is a two-way street, marriage counselors say you can also fix things by making an effort on your own. Sometimes, one’s effort can be big enough to keep a marriage.
Fixing Broken Marriage
Stop Asking The Wrong Questions
Stop asking yourself why your marriage feel broken. Romantic relationships aren’t luck; they’re a choice. From personal experience, it isn’t about finding the right spouse; it’s about loving the spouse you chose so you could fit each other.
Absence Doesn’t Make The Heart Grow Fonder
According to marriage counselor, absence keeps your marriage broken and you from being on the same page. It could create distance and separate married couple, which could expand marriage problems and go against marital counseling.
Practice The Art Of “Time Out”
There are times when talking about your problems could make marriage work. Learn how to speak through actions from marriage counselor and know what to discuss and what not to through marriage and family therapists.
Marriage counseling couldn’t fix broken marriages in a snap. Married couples must also be taking measures to find solutions – creative ways or not – to fix your marriage and spend quality time together since marriage counseling relationship coach could provide tips (or maybe free ebook) on how to do it. But healthy relationship / healthy marriage efforts are yours and yours alone.
Rinse And Repeat
Like how Rome wasn’t built in a day, a marriage can’t be fixed overnight. It takes time, and there could be tears, but there could also be happiness. It’s not easy, and it could be a push and pull scenario. Just keep fixing it.
It isn’t all sunshine and rainbows
What will matter in the end is how you use these tips and strategies. Actively reach for each other and show each other that you still care about this marriage.
To add, “All couples can benefit from learning skills that are taught in couples therapy. That’s because these skills focus on cultivating a deep connection between partners and resolving conflict without shame or blame. And that helps all relationships,” says Margarita Tartakovsky, M.S.
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